Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Day 80 Spring is here!!

Seriously I CANNOT believe it's already 80 days into the year!! And 80 days that I've been watching (mostly) what I eat and losing weight.  This is probably the longest I've gone and I'm happy to say that I am BACK on track.  Not only am I back on track with my eating, but today is the first day of spring & I'm feeling a little spring in my step.  It's sunny & gorgeous outside & I HAVE to get in some exercise, there's just no excuses left, I have to start exercising.  I know that exercise is what's missing in my "program".  Yes I can cut out calories, but I know that exercising is the boost that I need to really kick my weight loss into gear. Plus I am feeling very squishy.  I carry my weight in my stomach & before I lost weight it was bulging out & tight (and oh so horrible).  But now that I've lost some weight the tension is gone & it's just all squishy.  And I don't want to lose all this weight to just be a big ol' bag of squishy skin. 

So TODAY is the day that I am going to start with some exercise.  I'm not sure yet if I'm going to run (have I mentioned how much I dislike running) or if I'm going to bike.  I think my tires need some air.  Either way, today is IT.  I am going to get some exercise in and I'll even take a picture of my red face when it's all said & done :)  Also, I got on the scale this morning & I am BACK to 266!!  So excited!  I know it's not my weigh in day so I'm not going to say this is my official weigh in.  I'm hoping that by my real official weigh in day that I'll be down to 263 & will be able to post my first "after" picture.  You know, when I started this process I totally didn't think it would take me over 80 days to lose 20 lbs but I've had a few stalls & set backs (of my own doing of course) but I am back on track & feel so happy to be back down to 266. Can't wait until Sunday's weigh in!!

Hope everyone else gets to enjoy the first day of spring!

Monday, March 18, 2013

Weekly Weigh In...

A day late but not a dollar short.  This morning I got on the scale & I was down another pound.  This morning's reading was 267, so at least I'm going back in the right direction even though I'm still a pound UP from my lowest weight, but I'll get there.  I know I will!!

Sorry this post is so short.  School is back in full swing, but I will try to post a longer post on Wed. since I don't have school that day.  :)

Hope everyone has a great week!!

Previous weight 268
Current weight 267
-1  lb
Total weight loss to date
-16 lbs

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Day 74 NS Victory Link Up


Today I'm linking up again with Katie & Lex over at KTJ Weighing In for the Non-Scale Victories link up.  Here goes:

My first NSV is another one I found at school.  My nursing school bestie is a wee little Asian man (ok he's not THAT little, but he's much smaller than me) who walks like the devil is chasing him ALL the time.  Now when I was bigger I REALLY had a hard time keeping up with him, sometimes I would just say "Go on, you don't have to wait on me" (although I don't know WHY he's always in such a hurry, he reminds me of the white rabbit in Alice in Wonderland, but I digress) and he would slow down.  And God forbid we really had a REASON to hurry, sheesh, it was like running a marathon to keep up with him.  I mean by the time we reached the nursing building where our classes were I'd be totally out of breath. Since losing the weight not only can I keep up with him while he's walking at his normal pace, the other day we wanted to get a coffee during break & we sprinted to Starbucks to make it there & back in the time we had & I kept up with him the whole time AND I wasn't even out of breath!! It's such a good feeling knowing that even this small amount of weight that I've lost has made a difference. 

My second NSV is about my stomach.  I carry all of my weight in my stomach, I am a true apple shape (unfortunately) & there are MANY times when my stomach is just in the way. Tying my shoes, bending over to pick something up off the ground, etc. I've noticed that after losing the weight my stomach isn't in my way so much & it's a really great feeling.

And lastly my third NSV actually has to do with my weight.  I am excited to see that I have been able to maintain my weight loss even when I'm not perfect on the plan.  It makes me excited to get to that finish line & know that I won't have to constantly worry about every bite of food I put in my mouth.  Does that make sense?

Anyhoo, those are my NSV's for this week.  What are yours?

Monday, March 11, 2013

Day 70 Weekly Weigh In...

Well after all of my lamenting, moaning & griping, I got on the scale this morning to 268.  So basically I'm up 2 lbs from my last weigh in.  Yuck, but not as bad as it could have been.  My weight has yo-yo'd this whole week (thanks to my erratic eating habits), but I am getting back on track.  I did pretty good yesterday if you don't count those FOUR Krispy Kreme donuts.  Hey, the hot sign was on!!  But really I didn't eat that much yesterday since I was at the ball field all day with my sister & nephew, so that's why the donuts didn't make a huge impact, thank God.  I started out the day with my usual egg tostada's & for lunch I had one ballfield hamburger, then the KK's & for dinner I made some kind of cheesy pasta thing, so all in all it wasn't too terribly bad, but I didn't track which is a problem.  I find that when I'm tracking my food I do SO much better.  Then yesterday when I got home I got on FB & several of my friends had posted either about their weight loss or about exercising so I felt like God was trying to tell me "Look, they're doing it & so can you!".  So, I'm getting back on track & I'm feeling better about where I am now, as opposed to where I was a week ago.  We'll see next week what the scale says about this.  I'm going to go make me some water now :)

Previous weight 266
Current weight 268
+2  lb
Total weight loss to date
-15 lbs

Saturday, March 9, 2013

Day 68 Better now...

Ok so I know I sounded pitiful & desperate in my last post & I guess I was but probably not in the reason you're thinking, or in the reason I said.  Let me clarify. 

When I said I was on a week long binge it wasn't in the traditional sense of binging.  Since I had the lapband I can't really go on a true binge where I eat tons of food at one sitting like I used to be able to do (Thank God).  These past two weeks or so I have been binging but in a different way. 

See, a lot of people have trigger foods that start them down the road of a true binge, and so far I'm not sure if I have a certain food, but what I do know is that eating out is my nemesis.  I don't really know how to explain this.  I LOVE to go out to eat, and it's really not all about the food.  For me eating out gives me a sense of feeling "normal".  I know that may sound weird to some people but it's true.  I know that this is a psychological thing inside of me & it probably stems from the fact that growing up we were pretty strapped for money.  My mom was a single mom & she raised me & my sister on one income with no child support & needless to say that strict budget did NOT include going out to eat, like never, not even to McDonald's.  So I guess you could say as an adult I look at going out to eat as a sign that I'm ok.  I'm not struggling, I'm "normal".  Does that make senese?

Since starting back to school full time I've had to stop working & that means we're down to one income & on that strict budget guess what got cut out?  Yep, eating out. Now that actually turned out to be a really good thing b/c it forced me to make all of our meals & probably facilitated the good decisions I was able to make b/c I didn't have the temptation of eating out.  Buuuuttt a few weeks ago we got a little thing called a tax refund & now that I have a bit of money guess what I've been doing?  Eating out every chance I get!!  That is where my binge comes in.  It's not binging in the sense of eating too much food, but more of eating the WRONG food at EVERY meal. So I guess you could say my problem really isn't with the food as much as it is with the money, which I know is a totally different problem not covered on this blog.  But in a sense the two are tied together & it's not good. 

Soooo, I got on the scale this morning & saw that it's actually 5 lbs that I've gained back, but still a gain is a gain & it's very disappointing.  Also my own lack of self control is disappointing.  But the good thing is that I know that I can do this, I mean I did it for over 60 days & did a great job at it.  I've just got to find my way back, and I will, starting today!!

Thanks for the encouraging comments. 


Thursday, March 7, 2013

I'm on a downward spiral & I can't stop...

It started about a week ago, I have been binging for about a week now & I can't seem to stop!!  I have gained EIGHT pounds in a freaking WEEK, heck actually less than a week!!  I don't know what to do to stop myself.  I have been hiding it from my husband too. I'm out of control & I know I need to stop but I can't seem to stop myself......what am I going to do???  I don't want to continue down this path, especially since I've done so good for so long!! Why am I doing this to myself????  I went SIXTY THREE days following the program & now I'm all derailed....I'm sorry to let all of you guys down as well :( 

Ugh, I need to get it together.................

Monday, March 4, 2013

Day 63 March is here...(Weekly Weigh In, late)

So March is here & I know I've been MIA on my posts but school is a little hectic.  This is our last week before spring break & it's a doozy so I'll try to catch up today.

Weekly weigh in for Sunday - nothing new to report, holding steady at 266.  No gain, but no loss either & that's just become unacceptable, this "plateau" is going on way too long & I know that it's my fault. 

And it's the beginning of a new month so that means it's time to review my "goals" for February & set some new ones for March so here goes:

February's goals:

  • I plan to continue with my fruits and vegetables. I'd like to try to get in at least 3 servings of fruit & 5 servings of vegetables each day. I'd say I met this one about half of the time & it's not really from a conscious effort, sometimes I get them in by what I eat for the day & sometimes I don't. 
  • I want to incorporate exercise into my week. My goal for February is to exercise 3 times a week. No time limit, just three times a week for every week in February. Ugh big FAT fail on this one, unless of course I can count clinicals 2 days a week (definitely lots of walking that I'm not used to).  This semester kicked my butt as far as time was concerned so this one didn't happen.  Fortunately though it's about to slow down so I think I'll try this one again, plus the weather is getting warmer & that's always great.
  • I'd like to plan some menu's so that I can get a better grip on my eating in the evenings since school has started back. Hmm, I didn't really use any new meals that I made up, but I did continue to use the great ones I got from Runs for Cookies, so maybe that's a half accomplished?
  • And lastly I'd like to weigh 260 by the end of the month. Unfortunately that one did NOT happen.  I've been steady now at 266 for the past two weeks & I am over it.  This one has got to get kicked in the bootay! 

So on to my goals for March:

  • Exercise!!! I know I've said it before, but this time I'm serious!!  Again, my goal is to exercise 3 times a week, minimum of 20 minutes each time. 
  • Track/get in my water every day.  I have REALLY been slacking on my water. 
  • Not eat out more than once a week.  This last week I have eaten out WAY too many times & now that my schedule should be easing up I want to go back to more healthy, home cooked meals.
So those are my goals for March.  I think I'm going to print these out & put them several different places around my house, say one of my bathroom mirror, one on the fridge, one in my car somewhere as a reminder of what I'm supposed to be doing. 

Now I'm off to do more paperwork for school.  How did everyone else do for February?  Did you meet your goals?  I hope so!!

Later gator!

Previous weight 266
Current weight 266
-0 lb
Total weight loss to date
-17 lbs